5.28.2011

The Remedy To My Midlife Crisis

Some call me a hypochondriac, but I call myself aware. The other day I looked up the signs of a midlife crisis, it made me almost certain that at the ripe age of 20 I'm experiencing such. I've always been old for my age so I'm really not all that surprised by this... Does this mean that I'm dying at 40 then? I never really understood that.


Signs I'm having a Midlife Crisis:


1. Change for the sake of change. I feel so restless lately, like I'm just being idle with my life. I need to switch things up, and fast.
2. Impulsive behavior and impetuous decisions, especially about money and/or their career. Who needs education, I just want to travel the world! New outfit? Sure why not. Rihanna concert instead of paying off school? Ya, throw that in there too. While I'm at it why don't I just go get a degree in philosophy (or something equally as useless), who needs a career!
3. Changes in the sexual relationship. Uhh... I keep having dreams where I'm kissing really old celebrities? Let's just say that counts.
4. Sudden obsession with appearance and spending inordinate amounts of time in the mirror. This is the big one my friends. Yesterday I found a grey hair in the mirror while I was trying to decide what to do with my new acne. Can someone explain this to me? I have never gotten a zit in my life but now I have acne and grey hair to boot. My body doesn't know how old it is; I DON'T KNOW WHO I AM. 
5. Excessive reminiscing about their youth and previous loves. This one can mostly just go to the fact that I'm single and most of my friends aren't.
6. Increase in alcohol consumption. I've been eating more mini-chocolate bars than ever; they're my whiskey.
7. Sleeping more, loss of appetite, and general malaise. I can't wake up before 9 for the life of me and the other day I turned down cake...?


As I wrote that out I realized I might just be a tad bit dramatic. In all seriousness though, can all you people older than twenty explain my sudden depression with life? I have never felt so useless and unmotivated before. It's making me question every choice I make lately. Should I go back to school? Do I still wanna stay in my program? Can I pull off red lipstick? Should I dye my hair brown? Man, life decisions I tell ya!


Just in case this was the real thing though, I followed suit like old men buy fancy new cars, and got one of these. It's really helping; I feel so alive! 



At first, I was skeptical and didn't wanna follow the instragram loving, iface fat using crowd but now I'm a believer. I will never go back to anything else. I feel bad since I got a camera for Christmas and I haven't used it since I got this, but I just love that I can snap a pic that doesn't look half bad whenever and make myself look fat, old, or bald. Plus, what would I do without plants vs. zombies, or solitaire, when I'm crazy bored? I'm really improving in my game too. Look at this solitaire time and moves ladies and gentlemen:


holla!

And here are some pics from the weekend.


We rode a dinghy and I'm still burnt and peeling.




Oh, and P.S. I'm loving scrabble lately. This is an epic game I played against Scott. OMG is right tile board!








2 comments:

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  2. kelsey, you're just suffering through a normal 20-something quarter-life crisis is all. i never had acne either til i turned 21. now i get it places that my proactiv can't even reach. and grey hairs? apparently i don't get the luxury...since all mine come out stark WHITE.

    my only bit of advice is to find how you can serve those around you. even in my darkest and weirdest times i've been able to find hapiness through service and acts of selflessness. i freakin' went once a month to the animal shelter in ottawa and played with all the kittens and puppies---you just gotta get creative!

    as for advice on the adult acne...a 4-month sabbatical to hawaii will do wonders, i tell ya! hang in there!

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