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6.12.2011

Braces and Brides

Reasons Why I Might Be Living At Home When I'm 40:

Exhibit A: Tonight I had my friends ask me to come to some YSA stuff. I declined so that I could repaint an old mirror, buy some penny candies, and watch the social network with my mom. That just seemed so much more exciting than dancing. Is it too much that all I want is to do is go to bed at a reasonable hour sometimes?

Exhibit B: I'm getting braces the Monday I get home from Vegas. (Side note: did you know I was going to Vegas? Surprise from my rents! I'll explain more about that later. It really is a treat) I've mentioned this sad news a few dozen (thousand?) times to my friends. You know what happens to 20 year olds with braces? Sympathy from other 20 year olds because no one would ever wish it upon themselves. You know what happens to 20 year old student teachers with braces? Their life is H-E-doublehockeysticks. You might be wondering, "But Kelsey, why the braces when you're teeth are straight?" Well I'll tell you reader. Turns out I have the jaw of a 60 year old English woman and it's crumbling at a rapid rate. I say English because my dad is such and he passed the glorious trait of an underbite to me. I'm sorry future children; blame it on Gramps. I had a point to this exhibit... Oh right. Since I will be a hermit for the next 14 months I will lose all, if any, social skills I once possessed and will eventually become a recluse in the basement of my parents. Anyways, onto happier times with this post.

Exhibit C: Why would I wanna leave when I have all the entertainment I need at home?

The other night I was asking my parents which of them gave me my unevenly curly hair. My dad pipes in "I am poker straight!" I turned and said, "Dad I'm not too sure about that, you've seemed really iffy lately." My mom thinking she was real witty chimes in, "That's what she said!" She's still learning how to use that phrase right.

After I explained I was referring to the fact that I was calling my dad a "non-heterosexual" my mom says, "You wanna know what's the worst about him being a little gay? That means I'm a lesbian."

How can I abandon them now? I feel like I have so much to teach them.  Plus, Matthew McConaughy made it look not too shabby in Failure to Launch. He lived the life! Aside from ya know... the broken heart and inability to commit. Crap.

Oh, and P.S. I did leave the house this weekend. To see my beautiful friend Miken get married! Here are some pictures. She was gorgeous and the decorations were amaaaaaazing.







I caught that. HOLLA!

baaaabe

Miken and Bran's future posterity. ;)



My pretty friend Amelia.

1 comment:

  1. hahahaha. I'm afraid I know all too well what its like to have no problem hanging out with your parents and going to bed early instead of going dancing or something that should seem fabulous... My parents are just so hilarious. And I really like going to bed early too. It makes the next morning so much happier..
    You said this all perfectly.

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